Adama Hamadi, Delicious Living Coach. Yup, that’s what I’m calling myself. Get used to it.
As a recovering “approval addict” and professional “people-pleaser,” I know all too well how putting others first can drain the spirit. Between wishing I could be “good enough” and being conditioned to settle for “good enough,” I lost sight of the fact that I was wasting my power and withering away. I woke up a few months ago with paralyzing chest pain and zero motivation to do anything. I realized that I could not go on fighting for other people’s dreams while completely ignoring my own.
I accepted that continuing to subdue my passion would surely kill me. I found the courage to be authentic about the things in my life that were inauthentic. I stopped saying I was “fine” when I felt racked with anxiety. I started asking for “mental health days” when I sensed that my depression would keep me from getting any real work done. I weaned myself off of the emotional vampires in my life that were coming to me when they needed something, but not committed to holding space when I was in need. And I started listening to the voice (Intuition, God, Universe) that told me my experiences could shape great lessons for women like me. I’ve always had a teacher’s heart, but I came to realize that I also have the spirit of an entrepreneur. Why not share what I’ve learned AND get paid? And determine my own schedule and vacation? Yaaas honey! So I decided to build a location-independent coaching business. I would teach millennial women how to ask for what they want so that they could savor a life that they don’t need to numb or run away from.
I have been talking about launching this coaching business for months now. I even started pages on Facebook and Twitter(Handle:dreamleaplive, holla at me!) But I realize now that my commitment to making a living working for myself was being trumped by a hidden commitment to protect myself from failure and humiliation. For months, I held myself back from the success that I claimed I wanted. I compared myself to people that had “made it.” I watched countless Ted Talks and Youtube clips on personal development and life coaching. I filled notebooks with ideas about how to find a target niche, and how to close a sale, and how to build a brand. I agonized about the minutia of how to become an expert, because of course I had to make sure to do things the “right” way. I was keeping myself busy so that I wouldn’t have to do the ACTUAL work of putting myself out there. But if I want to be known as fierce, free, and fearless, and if I want to inspire other women to live out loud without waiting for permission, I have to commit to doing things that scare me. Like posting ALL my business on a blog. Apparently, it is possible to “feel the fear and do it anyway.” You’re welcome 😉
P.S. What commitments have you been abandoning out of fear? Tell me about it in the comments.